My earliest memories are after age 10 - I really can't remember much at all before then - I often wonder why that is? As a young boy, I don't recall having a lot to do with my sisters, but I idolized my brother Geoff. Even at age 16, Geoff was the influence for me joining the Navy. Probably not many people know this, but I felt really bad that I couldn't comfort Geoff in some way when his marriage with Anne broke down. I really felt for him.

My time in the Navy was great for me. I learned so much, met some great people, visited some interesting places and generally had a good time. I started as a Junior Recruit, only a fortnight after my 16th birthday, and became a Writer sailor in 1980. I did a bit of night school while in Darwin in 1982 and 1983, which enabled me to be commissioned as an officer in 1984. I graduated from the Naval College in 1985. I think my Naval career was fairly successful. I believe I was well regarded. I achieved very good results in my professional studies. I always felt that my efforts were appreciated and worthwhile. I retired from the Navy in 2001, although I actually left on long service leave in 1999. I probably would have stayed in the Navy a lot longer, but it was moving too slow for me, and my computing company was showing much better opportunities for me to expand my interests. I was also nearing completion of a sea posting where I had been reasonably successful, and had been recommended for early promotion to Commander and posting to Fleet Headquarters. I didn't want to live in Sydney.

I met Debra in 1984 in Darwin. We were together for a month or so short of 20 years, and we have two children - Callum, born in 1991 and Madeline in 1995. I enjoyed our time together. I was sad that our relationship broke down, and my estrangement from my children is hard to cope with. I sort of think things happen for a reason though, and I know now that separating from Debra was good for both of us. I don't know what to make of my children not communicating with me.

Debra and Ken Fannie Bay 1984

College Graduation 1985

Christmas 2002

I had a bad couple of years from mid 2005 to mid 2007, following my separation from Debra - I felt very strongly about ending my life then. I spent several months in and out of hospitals trying to get going again, but I found it hard. I felt alone and worthless, so I alienated family and friends in preparation of committing suicide. I had to give up my computing interests, which were my financial stream. I had built these up over many years, but just couldn't service them anymore mentally. I had several unopened orders for software in my e-mail inbox just sitting there doing nothing - it wasn't right, but I couldn't bring myself to process them. I was taking medication which was causing me to sleep long hours and I didn't feel it was good for me. I found it difficult to recover from my breakup with Debra and separation from my children. In early 2007, I attempted to divert my attention to a new relationship, but clearly wasn't ready.

I met Rhea online in May 2007. I visited her in the Philippines in June 2007, became engaged in July 2007, then flew back and married her in September 2007. I began living full time in the Philippines in November 2007. Our relationship was strained due to cultural differences and my inability to cope with those differences. I was totally unprepared for living in the Philippines - a vastly different country to Australia, and most of Asia, and this impacted significantly on our relationship. We split up in December 2008, and continued to communicate with each other for several months in an effort to sort things out, but it didn't work. We had some great times together, which I will remember for ever.

In my earlier days I had quite a few hobbies and interests - I used to collect stamps and had quite a good collection of Australian stamps including a mint collection and first day covers. I used to dance - was actually quite good at it and even won an Australasian Championship. I also used to sail dinghies and much later on I had an excellent collection of red wines. I have always had an interest in gardening, and in recent years, farming, but I now live in an apartment in Bangkok - it's a bit hard to farm on my balcony. So these days my interests are somewhat different. I enjoy stimulating conversation about most things, and good company. I'm interested in small business development, and I intend to recommence consulting in some sort of capacity when I sort out my VISA situation in Thailand. My other interests are computing, playing pool and darts, and singing. I'm pretty good at pool - I am the Captain of an 8 ball team in Bangkok. I think I'm actually getting better at singing - or maybe I'm just going deaf ha, ha, ha. I just know though, I need a lot more practice at darts. I'm just so glad I haven't killed anyone with them so far!! I sing in public regularly - sometimes in karaoke bars and restaurants, and sometimes with bands in clubs. I also like eating prawns, but doesn't everybody?

I hope I can live near a prawning beach one day and have an early morning ritual (well - maybe mid-morning) of catching my lunch every day. My ideal day may consist of an early morning net trawl for lunch, followed by a shower or spa, and some computing or business online. Late lunch - prawns and home grown coffee of course with freshly baked bread. A bit of singing or dancing in the afternoon - maybe lessons or maybe as a teacher. A bit of work around the garden after the hot sun goes down, followed by a meal with my lovely wife. A chat with friends maybe after dinner and off to bed early'ish about 10pm. No house mortgage, no advertising, no pollution, no work pressures or competing priorities, no TV, no cell phone, no problems . . . Just a tropical paradise, with a nice view and a loving wife who shares my enjoyment of these things (or who can produce her own enjoyment without it conflicting with mine). Yeah, I think that sounds about right. What do you think?

If I couldn't live my ideal day every day, and If I had my life over again, I would probably be a Farmer or Landscape Gardener. Ideally of course, it would be my own farm or business, and it would probably be in Queensland if it had to be in Australia. I'm certain there are more idyllic places in the world to live, but I haven't found my utopia just yet. Largely though, I think I would have been content with that.

I have strong opinions on many subjects, and am happy to discuss them with just about anyone as I enjoy conversation. I draw a lot of criticism here, but I'm not sure why because communication is all about imparting one's thoughts, and it is an exchange of (usually) differing views. I see it as my role when communicating to express my thoughts accurately and convincingly, and for the recipient to express theirs equally so. Both exchanges in a civil and respectful manner. I think that is what I do. I mean, seriously, (and notwithstanding the fact that everyone is allowed to be wrong) if you are not prepared to justify what you have to say, you are really only gibbering shit aren't you?

I don't like the dishonesty and short-sightedness of Australian politics. I detest being continually marketed at and treated as a commodity. I don't handle rudeness all that well. I hate the way banks rip me off. I don't like globalisation, even though there are aspects of it that are consistent with my belief in quality management. I'm not keen on dirty and untidy environments, and I'm not usually attracted to lazy or slovenly people.

I'm trying to seek a simple and relaxed lifestyle, but haven't found it yet. I know everyone seeks a good life, but I think I was actually only a bee's dick away from it on a couple of occasions. I like simplicity and I like tranquility. I like to be innovative and resourceful, and I believe in my ability to succeed at anything I choose. I sometimes think I suffer from being a 'Jack of all trades, but Master of none'. Work-wise, I'm a believer in Quality Management, and I like the concept of 'centralized management and decentralized execution'. The data warehousing concept of 'write once, use many' makes a lot of sense to me too. Personally, I'm bit of a mis-fit - my family upbringing didn't teach me how to be a loving person, and the Navy sure as eggs didn't give me those skills either, so I never really learned it. I'm continually assessing myself and my life, but I don't have the answers to life yet!